Identity Crisis: Are You or Will You Be a Senior?
By Barbara Morris, R. Ph.An article in the local newspaper, "Director hopes to fight senior stigma" documents the declining attendance at a local senior center because it appears older people don't want to be labeled "seniors." Yaaaay!
Here's the deal at the senior center: For just $25 a year you can partake of the following activities: poker, sewing, pool, ceramics, quilting, doll making, watercolor and bridge. All great stuff. I'd love to learn to play poker or shoot pool and even play bridge but here's the thing: Frankly, I don't want to learn how to do anything in an age-segregated situation. It's depressing. If I want to learn something I'll sign up for a class at the local community college where I'll be exposed to people of all ages and circumstances. When you associate with an age-diverse mix of people you open yourself to growth and it keeps you in touch with the larger world and helps you stay ageless.
The other thing is, what is offered at the center are passive, "living life as a pastime" activities. There are no offerings to help seniors learn how to earn additional income. Heaven forbid that the center might offer computer classes that would help equip seniors to find a job.
But back to the senior center dilemma. In a nutshell, it appears that management of the center doesn't understand that declining membership has something to do with eligibility starting at age fifty. I don't know any fifty- year- old woman who thinks of herself as a senior. (Maybe you know fifty year old "seniors" but I don't.) The term "senior" has become a dirty word to many older women, and well it should. It is loaded with too much decline-oriented baggage.
Remember when you had to be sixty-five to be labeled a senior? And then it was sixty, then fifty-five? Now it's age fifty. I have a hot flash for the management of the senior center: The lifespan has increased by 30 years in the past century. Women today at age fifty are not seniors which means not too many women at age fifty are looking to hang out with women much older then themselves. They are not interested in learning how to shoot pool with women their mother's age.
Why do we insist on rounding up older people and labeling them with restrictive designations? Why can't we call older adults "older adults" and let it go at that?
I can give you one huge reason our culture tries to corral and label older people with the senior designation: Money. Seniorism is very big business. Many people make their living providing services, needed or not, to seniors. And because so many older women are rejecting the senior label, those who provide senior services try to widen their net by lowering the age of entry into seniorhood. Thankfully, it appears not to be working as well as it used to.
The traditional senior culture as it exists today is a dinosaur except for those very advanced in years. When you get to be eighty, it may (and I stress "may") make sense to look for companionship at a senior center. However, many eighty-year olds are not looking to play bingo or find companionship with a suitable old geezer. They are out hiking or otherwise being productive.
If the senior center cannot find enough people willing to label themselves seniors it needs to shut down and save taxpayer's money. It's as simple as that. For "card carrying seniors" (those who proudly call themselves seniors) looking for classes or companionship, if they can find a way to a senior center, they can find their way to a local community college where they will find rewarding classes and activities that will put them in touch with the real world and provide an opportunity to meet Interesting people who are not just clones of themselves.
Source: August, 2008 Put Old on Hold Newsletter
Barbara Morris — Image F/X Publications
Barbara@PutOldOnHold.com
760-480-2710
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