The Easy and Hard Part of Aging
by Barbara Morris, R. Ph.
Believe it or not, the easy part of managing the aging process is maintaining appearance. It is one of the few things associated with aging over which you have some control.
If over the years you eat a decent diet, take supplements, exercise regularly, and generally live a prevention-oriented lifestyle, you can look fabulous well into your mature years. If wrinkles and sagging take up residence and betray the young person within you, many non-invasive procedures work well to restore the appearance of youth and won’t bust the budget. However, the ultimate prize for taking care of yourself early on is not just an above average appearance, but far fewer health issues as well in later years. Prevention pays off – big time.
Okay, if looking good is the easy part of managing the aging process, what’s the hard part?
The hard part is managing what goes on in your head and the lifestyle you choose to live. It’s really difficult because as you age you have to deal with outdated and set-in-stone ideas about aging, as well as horse-and-buggy cultural norms that just won’t go away. The pressure is heavy to fall into line and do what everyone else your age does.
Even though the lifespan has increased by 30 years in the past century many, if not most women continue to think of themselves as “middle aged” at age forty. Not only do they refer to themselves as middle aged, they start mouthing culturally sanctioned nonsense such as “I’m having a senior moment” or “I must be getting old” when having a brief memory lapse – a “problem” experienced by everyone, young and not so young.
Claiming to have “senior moments” and berating yourself with “I must be getting old” is not adorable or endearing; it’s dangerous because it legitimizes “disability thinking”. It diminishes your capacity to stay strong and in control of how your life evolves as you continue to age. Words have meaning and the words you use to describe yourself and your abilities are powerful and have consequences.
Then there is the “I’m too old to do that” syndrome that continues to thrive even though the notion is a proven crock. It’s absurd when a 40-year-old woman conditioned by outdated norms and traditional attitudes thinks she’s too old to start her own business or go back to school or change careers. The “I’m too old to do that” syndrome effectively pulls the plug on the dreams of competent, capable older women who still have the capacity to achieve.
As for the lifestyle you choose to live, I can tell you with certainty that if you want to hang on to the youthful goodies you have right now you had better find a way to avoid becoming part of the senior culture, before and after you retire. As early as age 40 the business end of the senior culture has its “go get ‘em” guns blasting away with subliminal media messages and advertising that suggest you are getting old and in need of senior products and services.
At age 50 you will be getting an invitation to join AARP. Do you need AARP at age fifty? I know the AARP magazine is hip, trendy, and even helpful as it tries very hard to appeal to boomers so they will feel more comfortable reading a publication intended for retirees. I know AARP offers a ton of incentives to get you on board but if you fall for the seduction, your goose is cooked. You WILL start to think of yourself and accept yourself as a traditional senior – sooner than later.
The retired culture is a culture of decline because there is nothing about it that encourages, supports or promotes growth, and it shouldn’t. Retirement is called “retirement” because that’s what it is. It’s fine for those who choose to live that traditional lifestyle, but it’s not fine if you are intent on continuing to grow and be productive and if you want to fulfill your dreams and aspirations, and stay youthful and vital. Don’t think you can retain youthful traits if you hang out with passive retired women, or belong exclusively to age-segregated organizations. You have to find friends and activities that support your chosen mindset and lifestyle.
So there you have it. Don’t sweat it if the passage of time does a number on your appearance. You can pay someone to fix it. However, you can’t pay someone to inhabit your head and tell you what to think and how to live. That’s your job. It’s a tough job to be sure, considering the amount of destructive consensus thinking, advertising and cultural norms trying to push you into decline. But you can avoid it when you are aware of what you need to do, or not do, to look the way you want to look and live a life that is of your choosing and not dictated by tradition that no longer makes sense – if it ever did.
Source: March, 2010 Put Old on Hold NewsletterBarbara Morris — Image F/X Publications
Barbara@PutOldOnHold.com
© 2010 – Image F/X Publications, All rights reserved. If you "borrow" my articles, please give proper attribution. Thanks!
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