Barbara Morris
Should you reveal your age? Never, according to Barbara Morris, pharmacist, anti-aging expert, and author of the hot new book, Put Old on Hold.
She says those who insist you should always be upfront about your age are usually folks who look or feel older than they are and don't care what others think. Or, they are kids in their 30's and 40's who have yet to feel the harsh sting of ageism still rampant in our supposedly enlightened society. Then there are the braggarts who think they look younger than their age and try to impress others with offers to "guess how old I am". Only old people do that!
Morris said she had much more fun before she plastered her age on the back cover of her book,
Put Old on Hold. "When nobody knew my exact age, I was treated differently. Because my age was not known, and I look younger, people didn't make assumptions about my competence or abilities. Insidious, age-related comments were few. There was a "sense" of how old I might be, but because they didn't know for sure, they dealt with me as being just as capable or 'on the same page' as they were."
"It came as a blow to me that as soon as your exact age is known, you expose yourself to the biases, perceptions, and expectations that others have about how someone "your age" should walk, talk, think, dress, and behave. They will treat you in accord with their stereotypical notions, and I promise, it's not always as you would prefer."
"Accomplished, productive older people don't appreciate patronizing comments such as, "Isn't she doing great for her age?' or 'He's a little slow, but he gets the job done. After all, he's 65, you know.' Who needs that?"
Morris believes that "perceived age" should be legal. She cites a California anti-discrimination law that allows students and staff to define their own gender, meaning their perceived identity, appearance, and behavior. "If it's legal to define one's gender, then the right to define one's perceived age should be legal as well. Having to put your 'real age' on an employment application, especially for older people, limits (or destroys) opportunities, curtails financial potential, and puts you in a discriminatory "age box" labeled with all the perceived shortcomings of someone 'your age'."
"We need some serious consciousness raising about how we think about and deal with advanced age and the aging process. Unfortunately, this kind of social change is slow to occur, and until it happens, those older people who want to be valued for who they are, and not when they were born, would be wise to keep their age as private as their bank account number."
Barbara Morris
Barbara@PutOldOnHold.com
www.PutOldonHold.com
Barbara Morris — Image F/X Publications
Barbara@PutOldOnHold.com
760-480-2710
© 2005 – Image F/X Publications, All rights reserved
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Put Old on Hold wisdom:
“Paint a new picture for yourself—a
picture in which you enjoy a productive, vibrant life at 75. Be willing to
look at the picture, and take action NOW to achieve it.”
— Barbara Morris
